August 21, 2011

• Xanga, homosexuality, and religion and obsession

  Edit:  anyone coming here on @Seedsower shout out, I am usually not this "controversial". I don't want people thinking she has lost her touch.

   

  Since I have been sort of back I have noticed a trend in front page entries, and a general trend on xanga.  Now, today isn't so bad, it's Sunday and I think people must be exhausted with the amount of arguing and " discussion" of religion or belief in God and the lack thereof. And whether or not Gay people are pushing their disgusting agenda down others throats or not.  I do remember some political debates back in the day, but the gay thing and religion, not so much on here.  And even the politics were tame.

  The lack of mutual respect is pretty shocking to me.  And the waste of time.  Can I just tell all of you people ( who probably aren't even reading this) it is a WASTE of your valuable time.  NO ONE is going to change someones mind.  In fact, if you actually change someones mind I want to know about it, because I will be shocked.  

  Having said that, I am going to give my lame views on one.  Or at least what I have observed.  I don't even care if I get rude comments, bring it on.  I won't argue back though, I am just stating what I think and see.  And arguing back has already proven to be futile and annoying.

  The subject I feel most strongly about is the homosexual one.  I am not gay, I am not Bi.  In fact right now I am anti romance, sex and coupling.  But that's just an odd quirk that could pass, and if it does, I like men.  Romantically.  Not really in a lot of other ways because men really are from Venus and I don't always understand them. 

  Just because I know a few gay people does NOT make me an expert in homosexuality.  Not even close.  I can only say what I have observed and what I have seen and it's going to shock many of you.

  Eating dinner in a gay community, in this case boys town in Chicago - disappointingly normal, it was the same as eating dinner in a straight community.  No sex on the tables, no converting an obviously straight man with his wife or girlfriend at the next table. No lesbians coming on to me.  Which is not really a surprise , since lesbians have never been attracted to me, where as other friends have had lots of lesbians find them attractive.  Which sort of hurts my feelings, but I'm fine I guess. 

  Gay bar vs. straight bar- Both too loud to have a conversation.  Both too crowded to find a place to sit.  Both serve alcohol.  Gay bars have more men than women.  Straight bars have about an equal amount.  Both bars I am short and get lost in the crowd.  Both bars no one makes a move on me, again hurt, but then again who can see me? No line at the women's rest room at the gay bar, a plus. Again, no sex at the gay bar, not even that much PDA, and I would say the straight bars had more. Not that many great looking model types at either bar.  Huge disappointment at the gay bars.  You know everyone says the good looking ones are gay? My friends or friend when I went alone with only one of them, were by far the best looking men in every bar we went to.  I thought even if I couldn't have them, I could look, but nope.  Regular guys, some ok, some down right ugly.  Another plus in the gay bars, one gay bar had, instead of sports,  Golden girls on TV.  I love that show, couldn't hear it though, too loud in the bar.

  Breakfast at Gay restaurant- see dinner above.

  Gay relationships I have observed.

  They tend to like musicals more than men in straight relationships, although expunged enjoyed musicals, I had to buy the tickets and tell him we were going, it wasn't something he would have perused on his own. Also clothes shopping, although again, expunged liked shopping for himself and me when I was thin, but you wouldn't know it by looking at him now. But I think that is sort of rare in hetero guys. The shopping thing. But maybe not. Expunged always decorated our house too and has great taste, so much for stereotypes.

  Other than that in both Gay and Lesbian relationships I have seen and heard the following:

  They need to do laundry

  they are going grocery shopping

  One of them is annoying for leaving a towel on the floor

  They are going to a movie ( not porn)

  They are watching TV.

  One is watching TV. the other one is sleeping

  Dishes are piling up, they need to be done.

  If they have kids, the kids are driving them nuts

  Or they are bragging about kids

  They or one of them is going to work out

  They have a headache.

  They hate their job

  work is going well.

  sound familiar- Yawn

  I  have talked to my straight, women, girlfriends, 100 x's more than I have ever discussed sex with a gay friend.  I know more about my married female friends sex lives then their husbands would probably be comfortable with.  I know NOTHING about what my good, Gay friend does or does not do in the bedroom, except sleep or have a hard time sleeping.

  Gay people get together as couples for the same reasons I married expunged.

  I was attracted to him, yes, sexually, however there was so much more than that.

  I thought he would make a good dad, and he was.

  I thought he was a good match with me ( he wasn't).

  We laughed a lot pre marriage - that ended quickly

  We had basically the same values and spiritual beliefs, still do

  I felt emotionally, physically, spiritually, sexually, romantically, connected to him, not just one, but all.

  He was my best friend but I loved him more than a best friend.  I wanted to be with him forever. I thought he " got" me and I " got" him.  Again, WRONG.

  With every gay adult who is in a relationship, it is the same thing, same feelings, it isn't ALL about sex, probably not even close.  There have been gay relationships that have lasted longer than most marriages and trust me, if that is all about sex, well more power to them then, because lets be honest, you need a hell of a lot more than that to sustain a relationship.

  Almost every blog I have read here on Xanga reduces the gay relationship down to sex, and sex only.

   I would bet my life, (and this has probably been done) if a survey was done on long term gay relationships, starting from day one of living together, their sex lives correspond with heterosexual married couples on average.  In other words, some couples are insane and do it non stop, some once or twice a week, some go months with nothing.

   And sex, when PEOPLE have it, in a relationship, is an expression of love between the two people.  An extension of their relationship, not THE RELATIONSHIP.

  And YOU unless you are told, have ZERO idea what they are doing sexually.  All you know is they are not having sexual intercourse the way a man and women do, since no vagina is there ( in the case of two men). And no real penis is involved with two women. You don't KNOW FOR A FACT anything else. Just like I don't know what your doing and really don't care.  Why some people seem obsessed with the sex life of a gay or lesbian person is beyond me. 

  You can throw out your pick and choose biblical quotes all you want, but really, you are waisting your energy.  

  There have always been gay people.  There always will be.  Nothing you say, biblically or otherwise is changing this.  

  And although I really don't know Jack about politics, it seems to me, having an anti gay rights be a huge part of your political agenda only hurts.  

  But like I said, I won't change anyones mind with this blog.  It just felt good to write it.

   Because I know what I have SEEN, and witnessed, and been a part of, with my own human experience.  Where as some of you wouldn't know how a gay person thinks and feels, since you never bothered to actually talk to a person who just happens to be gay.

  We are all so much more alike than some of you realize.  We share the human experience.  We want love, acceptance, and respect.  We want to live our lives in peace.  We want to be able to get fulfillment out of our jobs, and or raising our kids, we want to enjoy a good meal, lose weight, be healthy, have nice things, have some sort of spiritual grounding, even if that isn't called God.  Unless you are an evil sicko who is so messed up and far removed from life, we all want the same things.

  And that's how I see it.

  You Xangan's can continue to blog about whatever you want, and go around and around.  I am going back to my " try ad be witty" blogs, and if you like those great, if not, you're not fun.

  
  

  • 11:32 pm
  • 52 Comments