Allow me to rant if you will, not about the price of gas, but about gas stations, in particular Shell Gas station.

I wanted to blog about this last winter, but life got in the way and then I remembered it the other day as I was getting gas.  So one cold, freezing, beyond cold, winter, Chicago, day I was arguing with myself as to whether or not I should get some gas.  Yes, I had been on empty for a day or so, but it was COLD and I really just wanted to go home and crawl into bed.  In the end, the rational side of me won and I decided I could stand it for a min or two whereas running out of gas in this weather would have sucked really, really bad. 

So I pull in to Shell.  Not the cheapest, but the closest at the time.  Let me preface that I was never a fan of self serve.  I liked having the cute but dangerous boy fill up my tank AND wash my windows.  But over the years I have gotten used to it.

However, I like simple pumps.  Slide the card, pick the cheapest, and pump.  Shell makes you answer a million questions about a car wash and am I sure I don't want one and did I get anti freeze today?  If that is not annoying enough, as I am freezing my large but cute tushy off, it is not cooperating and no gas is coming out because I did the order wrong or something. 

Finally, while I am trying to not let my fingers freeze on the metal, the gas starts coming out and I hear a loud mans voice yell " WELCOME TO SHELL".  I must have jumped ten feet in the air.  WTF, who said that?  Then I realize on top of the pump is a TV. and it's talking to me and showing me all kinds of things that would benefit my car. 

That really pissed me off.  Is that necessary?  What an added, stupid, expense.  First, in the middle of winter, the last thing I want to do is stand in the cold and watch TV.  Okay, maybe if they were showing Weeds, or Big Love, but a loud Shell man trying to sell me crap?  No.   I always get the gas started and then let it go while I sit in my car.  Granted, it's unheated, since no one has figured out how you can safely keep the car running while getting gas, but still...

So while I am shivering in the car, I am not even watching the TV.  What I am doing is wondering if this is part of why Shell charges $10.00 a gallon.  I can almost guarantee that Shell is not making any added money buy having the TV. up there.  And most people are not in the mood for the cheery " Welcome to Shell" message and as I already told the pump, "  No, I do not want a car wash, we are in the middle of an ice storm stupid Shell guy". 

So recently I was beyond empty again, and I pulled into a Shell which had no TV.  I am thinking they realized no one was watching the TV's and they got smart and removed them, but then I noticed the screen that asks if it's credit or dept, and it is having a running dialog.  I say dialog, because I was answering the questions.  "  NO, I don't want a car wash, and even if I did it wouldn't be from here"  "  No, I don't need engine dejunker or whatever, I don't trust you Shell, I think you are trying to rip me off"  "  In fact, I'm not reading anymore of this crap, just like I plugged my ears when your Shell guy was trying to sell me stuff." 

Oh where, oh where, is the cute, but dangerous high school boy?  Pretty soon the self checkout at the grocery store is going to be asking "  did you remember you feminine hygiene products?"  "  Have you douched today?"  " Constipated?"  " Prunes are on sale" 

Oh Shell, you give me gas.

Well a lot of people apparently.  People always say they are SO OVER the Jon and Kate plus 8 drama and let's let Michael Jackson rest in peace, bla, bla, bla.  But in truth we, and that includes me, are fascinated with Celebrities and fake Celebrities like Octo Mom. 

Sure it gets old and tiring, yes it's stupid, who cares?  But it's also fascinating.  Especially if your a people watcher like me and a pretend psychologist.  I am always psycho analyzing  Lindsay Lohan.  I really want to understand why Brad and Angelina have a family of 50 and how does Jen really feel about them?

As far as Ed cheating?  I think he was.  Jillian seemed like she was totally drawn to the guys who would hurt her.  But whatever, what's more important are those over night dates.  Doesn't it bother anyone else that these people are whores?  I  ( and I am going to be graphic here)  I am always thinking " eww they have so and so's sloppy left overs from  the last over night date."   I'm really NOT a prude, but come on your on national TV. here, your parents are watching.  Of course they're all coy and act like "wouldn't you like to know what happens on the overnight?"  But I have decided they are all doing it.

Jon is totally whoring around with a girl who went to Matt's school.  She used to be some skank from IU, but now she is famous.  I think her next move will be posing for Penthouse.  I don't think she's cute enough for Playboy. 

But back to why we/I care.  Human nature I guess.  For example, When I heard Ryan O'neill wouldn't let his son go to Farrah's funeral because he was " a bad person"  I was appalled.  Of course if Ryan was my relative I could have called him and given him a piece of my mind, instead I just told friends why I hated Ryan.  I told them I completely believed Tatum when she was on Oprah, and I think he is the worst excuse for a parent I have ever seen.

Caring about these people is my/our way of connecting to our fellow man, learning empathy, caring, and love.

Oh who am I kidding?  We love human misery and we're nosy and judgmental.  I'm not going to even apologize for it.   Gossip has been popular all the way back to biblical times. 

It's human nature.  Having said that, I can't wait to find out what the ex reporter has to say about Jon. 

Off to google.

Well that was a misleading title because if I knew how to get a job, Jennie would have one.  We just found out today that a  job she was more than qualified for didn't even grant her an interview.  She is taking it personally.  She wonders what she is doing wrong, she has read me her cover letters and they are pulitzer prize winning ( well, I'm exaggerating but I'm the mom).  This particular job involved working with kids less fortunate than she.  I decided it's her school.  They must think she is elitist.

I don't think I am going out on a limb here to guess that the majority of Northwestern Students have money.  Not that all snobs have money or visa versa but this job may think that is the case.  I want to call the job and explain how we are not rich, I want to tell them that Jennie and I actually share a bedroom, which is much like many poor people in the country.  Yes, we have two bathrooms, but no tub, just a shower. 

I discussed a new game plan with Jennie and we feel the best thing for her to do is change her name.  Jennifer expunge ( not her real last name) may not be what they are looking for.  She is going to change her name to

Latishajaneabahmarymariajoseoprahobamapalinhussainbrigitfrankdontyreaseadjoahjuleahbertaaponiabbysam

Garciawitzsmitholoielyambaumo'kellysenadamsdarbysabinadorcuseganmccainkennadycalderkingrubinsteinrodrigwitzwinnfreyjonessuzuki

And although she can't lie about the school she attended ( a good school by the way) she can mention that she peed outside in Africa and lived in a hut.  This will give her a good school AND let people know she can relate to poor bathroom and living situations.  She can tell them that although she is cultured in many ways, she watches just as many trash shows as the rest of us.  Yes, she's pretty but she struggles with her weight AND I have personally seen a zit or two.   Furthermore, she can mention that her grandparents have money in case they do want someone with money, BUT, her mom (me) is right there on the poverty line.  Her dad ( expunge) is not college educated and her mom ( me) works below what her educational level would indicate. 

I thought the Phi beta summa Cum laude would work in her favor but maybe they think she is too smart.  I was thinking that she should add how many dumb things she has done.  This way she won't appear too smart.  Lets face it, some people are intimidated by bright people because they themselves are stupid.  And Jennie soon to be

Latishajaneabahmarymariajoseoprahobamapalinhussainbrigitfrankdontyreaseadjoahjuleahbertaaponiabbysam

  has tons of dumb things she could add to her resume. 

Any other ideas would be welcome.  Please join my cause

Get

Latishajaneabahmarymariajoseoprahobamapalinhussainbrigitfrankdontyreaseadjoahjuleahbertaaponiabbysam

Garciawitzsmitholoielyambaumo'kellysenadamsdarbysabinadorcuseganmccainkennadycalderkingrubinsteinrodrigwitzwinnfreyjonessuzuki

A JOB campaign

Bumper Sitckers will be available for sale soon

Let me preface this by saying, cover your ears I am going to yell , I KNOW THERE IS RACIAL PROFILING.  I know and agree that black people are stopped, harassed, and have false arrests made against them.  I personally get uncomfortable, if say, I am alone in an elevator with a black man, even if he looks professional.   And I KNOW it's irrational, especially because I work with perfectly nice non-rapist black men everyday.

Having said that, I really get tired of SOME black people using it ALL the time.  I agreed with Obama about the Harvard professor thing, even though he should have watched his wording.  That was probably a case of racial injustice and it does happen all the time.  That's a fact.

  However, the other day I was watching Prime Time Crime and the Michael Jackson story was on.  A former patient or someone like that of Dr. what's his name, said the media and cops are focusing on this doctor because he's black.  No, it's because he was THERE!  Yes, Michael had non black doctors, and they are being looked at too.   But of course you are going to focus on the guy who was there, who had money problems, who was his 24/7 doctor,who tried to resuscitate him, and who left the scene.  I was so irritated and wished I was the reporter.  I wanted to say, "  OMG, are you really saying that on national TV.?"  You are going to say that the ONLY reason this Dr. is being looked at is because he's black? 

I mean really?  Are you kidding me with that?

  At work, our group of boys changes about every 4 months or so.  Boys leave, new ones come.  Almost every group has one black boy that will accuse me of being racist.  I have heard the question " It's cause I'm black right?"  so many times I can't even count.  Usually it's because I am giving him a consequence. Sometimes though it is because I told them to do their math, or get to work.  I say "  Tyrone ( the real name of someone who said it to me last) you need to do your math NOW or I am taking points"  and he says something like " Man, you racist, it's cause I'm black right?"  "  You don't be sayin that to anybody else, you never say that to Tom"  We look over, Tom is doing his work. 

I used to argue, try and defend myself, I am tempted to lie and say I am half black, but now I just say " yep, it's cause your black."

Last night, my friend, who calls himself a " reluctant" Republican, said every time he disagrees with Obama, he is accused of being racist.  I know that happens to other people too. 

And I have heard from some Republicans, reluctant and otherwise, say that black people ONLY like Obama because he's black.  Which in SOME cases is probably true as there probably are some racists who don't like Obama due to race. 

But these sweeping generalizations piss me off.  As I said, black people get the short end of the stick in this country, still in 2009, but ...

 at some point I just want to say," no, it's not because you're black, it's because you're stupid", and just leave it at that.  

 The other day I heard on the news that driving while texting caused more accidents than drunk driving.  Duh, I thought, I mean really, what's next, reading a book while driving, taking a nap, watching TV, Blogging?

Granted I am a slow texter, which is why I love the new " speak it" option on my phone.  But even a whiz texter shouldn't do it while driving.  Right?

Fast forward to last night, Jennie and I are leaving the county fair.  My friend's daughter was in a pageant for fair queen.  My disdain for pageants will have to be another blog.  Anyway, we were leaving the fair and there are all these cops directing traffic and my left turn signal is broken, and it's night, and I suck at driving.  Jennie was continuing a conversation I started about how bogus pageants are, and how we left when our friend didn't make the top five, and maybe that was rude, but whatever,  when I drove over a cone. 

Me:  Shit, damn it Jennie, great!!!!!!

Jennie:  WHAT!? I didn't make you drive over the cone!

ME:  I am on supervision, SHIT, I'm probably going to get stopped, did you see all those cops, you should have stopped talking to me when I was turning.  You SAW I had to do the left hand signal with my arm AND you made me nervous.

Jennie:  MOM, you started the conversation, how am I supposed to know you were going to hit a cone when I continued it?  I'm not talking to you anymore.

My phone beeps it's a text.  I read it. It asks " Are you at the pageant?"

Jennie:  OMG, Are you kidding me?  Give me your phone.

Me:  No, why? 

I proceed to answer the text with my voice option.

Jennie:  Mom, you can't even listen to me talk without hitting a cone!  Give me your phone.  There is no way I am letting you text and drive!

Me:  I am using the voice option.

Jennie:  You read the text, give me your phone!

Me:  So what?  I am a fast reader, I barley looked at it.

Jennie:  You hit cones when I am talking, but you think you can read AND drive at the same time, yeah, mom that makes sense.

Me:  You made me nervous!!!!!!  And the cops and I am on supervision for that stupid illegal left turn and now my signal is broken, so yeah I hit the cone!!!!!  I can read the signs, so I can read the phone.

This continues until we are both laughing.

So I guess I am a hypocrite.  I always read my texts while driving.  To me text driving is where you actually answer the text by typing in the letters.  I have never done that while driving, but if I am being honest it is because I suck at it, even while not driving.

I am one of those people with a low emotional IQ.  I can't wait to read the text for when I am not driving, and pulling over seems silly and a waste of time.  I mean reading a text seems just the same as changing the radio station to me.

SHUT UP!  I know I am rationalizing.  Fine, I'll pull over.  You people are relentless.

From now on I will drive in silence, no phone, no radio, no passenger talk.

Gee, I hope I don't fall asleep and start napxting. 

Haven't bragged about the kids in sometime so I figure it's due.  Jennie graduated.  From college.  In my eyes that in and of itself is amazing.  Having attended and graduated college myself, I know.  It was a long eight years for me to get that BA.  Jennie finished in 3 and 1/2.   With a double major. Jennie graduated from the number 12th school in the nation, at least if you believe US. News and World reports, which I do because they ranked Northwestern as number 12.  If they had ranked it as number 300 I wouldn't believe them at all.  So, yeah, a lot of smart kids go there.

Jennie graduated summa cum laude.   Which means she was in the top 3% of her graduating class.  She is also a member of Phi Beta kappa.  Expunge never went to college and after my 8 years I graduated Summa Cum laundry and was a member of high betcha nappa.  So naturally we are proud and perplexed.  Matt is also bright and majors in Physics.  Physics is a subject I never took during my entire eight years of college and I don't think I even knew what Physics was during high school.  I did take Chemistry in college, it was my last semester.  I was married and pregnant with Jennie.  I told the professor I could not do lab work due to my condition.    I think he was shocked at my bold lie, and my age.  Anyway, no labs and I got a D minus as my final grade.  But this isn't about me.

Jennie had her first "real" or what I like to call, big girl interview last week.  It went well.  It was an entry level position, they had 400 applicants.  The guy narrowed it down to 15.  The interviewer talked to Jennie about the economy and basically let her know that despite her stellar credentials, getting a job in todays market is like winning the lottery.  

Jennie has informed me that there is a possibility that she may have to take an Americorp job.   That's if she can even get one of those.  They pay $900.00 a month AND they help you apply for food stamps. 

I'm no snob, I wouldn't mind getting some food stamps myself since I don't make much more than that.  But I kind of thought my Northwestern Summa Cum Laude girl would be making at least enough to buy her own food. 

This does not make me hopeful for the Physics major.  What do Physics majors do in the real world anyway?  Go to Grad School and acquire more debt?  Then what?  That girl from his school?  Jon's girlfriend from Jon and Kate?  She is going to make the big bucks now, just for screwing Jon.  Should I tell Matt to contact Kate?  Turnabout is fair play and then she can wear her IU shirt too.  Matt is good with kids and he was never busted for weed.

If Matt's not interested  I am going to have to go with plan B and find the rich, half dead, husband.  I really was hoping I wouldn't have to go that route, but times are hard.  I might even have to lift my no talking to the new husband policy.  But the no touching one stays.

This sucks.

Wow, I have not done one of these in awhile, but since I have time, I am doing a http://featured-grownups.xanga.com/ assignment.  If I were to write a book, what kind of book would I write?

I am probably never going to write a book, but if I were to write one it would either be a memoir or short essays ( which would basically be the best of my xanga entries.)  Or possibly a How to live with your ex husband for dummies and your dumb for living with your ex husband.

I have read quite a few memoirs and I think mine would actually be kind of interesting, I have had a lot of experiences that most nice Jewish girls from the suburbs don't get to experience, or nice any girls for that matter.  However, I am not sure a memoir is the way to go.  As the Million Little Pieces guy found out, you have to be pretty honest in a memoir.  And in order to keep it interesting you have to TELL ALL.  So if I were to say for example, someone sucked in bed, or that I never really did like so and so, that could cause problems.  Plus I am still hoping to get some money when my parents die.  It would be a risk to hope that alienating them in my childhood tell all, would be made up for in book royalties.  You may be wondering what my cool life experiences are, but I am still considering the memoir, so you'll have to wait. 

The short essay book would be easy.  I would just have someone edit my Xanga and poof, book.  But would it sell?  I have been told here from time to time that I should write a book.  I always tell people if they can get an interested publisher, I will give them some of my profits.  So far no takers.  Basically, I am too lazy and definitely not secure enough to seriously pursue book writing.  There are so many people like Dave Sedaris, Erma Bombeck, Augustan Burroughs, and so many more who I can't even touch.  But I am always sincerely flattered when anyone suggests the book writing thing. 

I am not sure about the Living with your ex dummies book.  So far I am the only one I know who is dumb enough to live with their ex husband.  And trust me, this is no easy living situation. 
For example, this is a picture of something expunge ( ex husband) put on our kitchen sink

Who does that?  I mean really does that not say it all?  I want to go in his bathroom and write flush here on the flusher since forgetting to flush is apparently a water saver, whereas the sponge thing is a crime against kitchen cleanliness all over the world. 

The other day he was going to " kill"  Matt for not closing the brown sugar bag.  I said "  wow, strong word KILL, how come you didn't KILL him when he smashed up your car, or jumped off the roof and split his tongue open, or was messing around at the show choir competition and put his arm through a window, or when he made the fake Id's, or when he drove without a license, AND broke into the pool for a senior prank?  I could go on and on but that would be a book in itself, I think you get my point.   

Of course, if I did write a book and it did actually sell, I would probably not live with my ex husband anymore, but then what would I write about for book two?  I don't think anyone wants to hear how I am now living it up by my pool and getting my much needed stomach removal surgery.

  But it sure would be nice to put the sponge wherever I damn well please.

When I was in Jr. high I had a friend named Beth.  Beth and I had a lot of sleep overs.  We did all kinds of fun things at our sleep overs.  We made prank calls ( before caller ID.) We streaked naked through the neighborhood because there was a popular song called the streak,  and we stole our parents booze and cigarettes.  We also looked at my dad's playboy and read parts out of The Happy Hooker.  Beth had  some experience with boys, I had none.  Either way, eager to practice, for when we got real boyfriends we kissed at sleep overs too.  One time we even felt each other up.  Poor Beth got the raw end of the deal though, since my boobs were about as big as my 4 year old brothers.
 
I wasn't attracted to Beth and I definitely liked boys.  In fact, even if I liked girls that way, I don't think Beth would have been my type.  But basically I made out with her and felt her up anyway.  I never thought much of it and later in life I found out boys did similar things.  Although it seemed like boys were a lot grosser, with their circle jerks and what not.  And I heard of boys showing each other how to masturbate and things that I would have never done with Beth, even if she asked. 

Now you may be wondering what on earth that has to do with my theory.  I'm getting to that. 

From what I hear most child molesters are 1) sexually attracted to children and 2) get off on the power and were most likely molested themselves.

That never really fit Michael Jackson from what I could see and it seemed he genuinely loved his little friends and was sincere when he said he wouldn't hurt a child.  Although, I would not be surprised to learn he had been molested at some point in his life.  He was definitely abused and used by his father.

But if you go back and read what the kids said happened with Michael , you could see it happening.   Why?  Because Michael Jackson did not think of himself as an adult.  When he had children over and had little boys sleep in his bed, it was just like any very rich 12 year old having another kid sleep over.  They watched videos and jumped on the bed, and giggled.  They played video games together and probably ordered pizza.

But some of the boys said they sometimes watched dirty movies together and there was some fondling going on.  He was never accused of rape, it always sounded like two adolescent boys experimenting.

Except Michael wasn't a little boy, he was a grown man.  And if you listen to him in interviews, he really didn't get that.  Against ALL advice from everyone he refused to stop sleeping in the same bed as little boys.  Even when he was married to Lisa Marie, he told Diane Sawyer he would not deny a child to sleep in his bed, with him, if they wanted to.

I don't think Michael believed he was hurting those boys.  I think he thought he was having fun with his friends. 

The man was emotionally 12 years old.  I think he was as sweet and shy and generous as everyone says.  He was amazingly talented.  And he was big time screwed up.

Even his whole dangling his baby off the balcony thing?  I could see an immature boy doing something like that.  I don't think Michael's frontal lobe ever developed. 

So I don't think he was a child molester in the classic sense of what we normally think we know about child molesters, but I do think he molested those kids.  I don't think he was attracted to little boys, I believed him when he said he didn't think of kids like that, but I still think there was touching going on and porn watching and drinking.  And I think Michael was just recreating what he never had when he was 12.

So there you have it, my theory.  No disrespect to an icon, some of you asked so I told ya. 

I welcome opinions, especially if you agree.

Weekends are a crappy time to blog, because apparently people have lives.  However, I have so much to say that even if I know that no one hears it, at least I said it.

Michael Jackson:  Wow, I have really weird, mixed, emotions on that one.  When I heard, and realized it was true, I had an odd overwhelming feeling of sadness.  Weird, because I really do think he molested those boys and normally I wouldn't care if a child molester died.  Maybe it's because the man was never convicted so I can't be 100% sure, or maybe it's because I felt sorry for him.  It's no wonder he was so F'd up, he was basically the parents meal ticket and he just got screwed over in the life dept.  I personally watched the Jackson five story several times, so I know.  Sure, he seemed to have it all, but in reality all he had was tons of talent and no shrink to fix him.
And he was such an adorable little kid too.  What a shame.
But yeah, he has always fascinated me with his wanting to be white and his self esteem issues and his strange and short marriage to Lisa Marie Presley, who in interviews seems kind of normal, but insists she had sex with Michael. 
I wonder what will happen to his kids, who I don't think are really his.  Will they be able to take their masks off now?  Can someone please adopt them and NOT give them to their mother who sold them to Michael?  Don't two of those kids have the same name?  Yeah, that needs to be fixed right away.  Who gives their kids the same name? 
As far as Michael molesting the boys, I have a theory as to why I think he did it, and why I think his motivation is different than other child molesters, but that would take a long time to write, and I have other topics I need to get to.

Poor Farrah, also a lost soul, and then she has the misfortune of dying on the same day as M.J and she gets lost in all the M.J mania even though I'm pretty sure she didn't molest any children.  Ryan gives me the creeps though, and I don't think I would like him if I met him, but might be too star struck to tell him. 

Mel Gibson is another story though, he's an anti-semitic hypocrite, I really can't stand him.  Oh who am I kidding, I would probably be like " so nice to meet you Mel, congrats on the new baby, I'm not really Jewish I NEVER even go to temple."

Poor Cher.  Don't even tell me you wouldn't care if your daughter was changing into a guy.  But that's not the worst of it, the worst is he/she has really let herself go.  Don't get me wrong, so have I, but yeah Chaz -ity loose some weight.  How she/he got the cute girlfriend has to be due to money.  She/he is NOT cute anymore at all.  Even as a guy.

Oh Kate, bitchy, bitchy, spank your kid in public Kate.  Give it up.  He's done, it's so obvious.  You blew it.  I was a bitchy wife too ( although not as bitchy as you) and I spanked, but never in public and I wasn't on TV.  Expunge didn't have hundreds of people saying I was a bitch and that I shouldn't spank my kids, and it still didn't work.  Not that Jon is any great catch, nor is expunge, but you know what I mean.

Then there's the cheating Governor, which is no surprise because he's a politician, but he runs off and doesn't tell anyone?  People are crazy.

I promise if I ever get money and power, I'll stay just as sane as I am.  Which isn't saying much, but compared to them it's saying a lot.

Since I am on a roll here with the controversial topics, I would like to discuss same sex marriage.  Can I just say I totally agree with California, people of the state should be allowed to decide who marries and who doesn't.  Makes sense to me.  But why limit it to gay people?  I propose a proposition nine.  A ban on all marriages unless approved by voters.

Before you dismiss this idea out right, listen to how it would work. 

Every couple who wants to marry, gay or straight must present their " case" before a carefully selected panel, made up of clergymen/women of all faiths, marriage counselors, psychiatrists, child rearing experts,  financial experts, a couple who has been married for 20 years or more, a gay couple who has been in a long term committed relationship for twenty years or more, and 10 random people representing all races and political beliefs. 

Then the committee will give their recommendation to the public, with their findings and written explanations from each person as to how and why they came up with this decision.

For example:  Couple A, lets call them Lisa and Jack.
 Jack has been married 3 times and two of his wives died " accidentally."  His last wife thinks he killed his former wives and claims he was physically and mentally abusive.  Jack has no job, and does not support or see his 10 children from his previous marriages.  Lisa is a crack ho and has lost custody of her 2 children from her former pimp.  

Couple B, lets call them Tom and Mike. 
Tom has been arrested for assault against Mike two times.  He has a job, but only makes $10.00 an hour and works part time.  Mike has been hospitalized for extreme depression and has attempted suicide several times.  Mike cannot hold down a job  for any length of time.   They do not plan on having any children and are currently seeing a counselor to work on their issues.

Couple C, Mary and Jane:
  Mary and Jane have been in a committed relationship for ten years.  They have two children together, one from Mary's egg and one from Jane's.  They used the same donor for each child.  Mary has a great job and Jane is a stay at home mom.  They have built a solid nest egg and the children's teachers all report how bright and well adjusted the children are.  However, Mary did have a one night stand with her ex, during the first month of their relationship.  They worked it out and things have been fine since.

Couple D:  Greg and Tina.
 Greg and Tina are both doctors and have been together for 5 years.  They do not want to have children as they are committed to their careers and feel kids would just get in the way.  They have been living together for the last three years of their relationship and it has been going well.

Last but not least Couple E,  Abhay and Charu
 have only met a few times.  This would be an arranged marriage decided on by their parents when they were young children.  Abhay is an engineer and Charu is a computer programmer.  They would like to have a large family.

They could even make it a reality game show type thing.  They could gong people they reject, like the old gong show.  ( I know, I am dating myself here).  This could really be big and I think it would cut down the divorce rate and actually REALLY preserve the sanctity of marriage, while  boosting the entertainment industry!  And we all know that's a plus!

So what do you think?  Who do YOU think should be allowed to be married?  Play the game with me, it's not as easy as it looks. Will it be couple A?  You tell me, it's up to you who gets to be married and who doesn't.

After this takes off, I think voters should also be able to decide who gets a divorce too. 

How am I the only one to think of these great things?